A Hopeful Romantic
By Shelia M Goss
I’m a romantic at heart. I believe in romance. I believe that there’s the perfect man for the perfect woman and when the two meet, all will be well in the world. At this point, you’re probably like wake up already. No, I’m not living in a fantasy world—romance is alive and well.
Contrary to what the statistics may say (divorce rate is on the rise), women and men still need each other. Women can be independent and wanting a man doesn’t make one less independent. A man can be in a monogamous relationship without the fear of losing himself.
We have to appreciate the differences and embrace them. One good way to enhance our relationships is communication. Communication doesn’t mean just verbal, but other ways to show our mate that we appreciate them.
Some things we just take for granted but when not done can cause a little friction. If you’re not already doing some of these things, try it and see what happens:
· Give your mate your undivided attention. This means that sometimes you need to let calls go to voice mail; turn off the TV; pull yourself away from email and the computer—you get the point.
· Schedule a date night. Whether it’s once a week or once a month, new and old couples need a night just to themselves. If you have kids, find a reliable babysitter. Do what you have to do so you and your mate can keep the flames burning. Keep in tune to what attracted you to your mate in the first place.
· Allow your mate some “me time.” Every now and then we all need to spend time away from our mates—whether it’s to read, a long hot bubble bath, a trip to the spa, hanging out with friends, or just quiet time alone. Believe it or not this can help your relationship.
· Give a card, send an email/text message or make a phone call “just because.” Don’t wait for special holidays or birthdays to show that you care. Do something every week, if not every day to let your mate know you’re thinking of them. And not out of any obligation, but because of your genuine affection towards them.
· Share a part of yourself that you don’t share with anyone else. This helps create a special bond and should bring you closer.
· Make a special CD with both of your favorite songs. Don’t forget to make duplicates so you both can have a copy in your cars (smile).
There are so many other ways to make your relationship stronger, but these are a few simple things that you can do. Remember to take the time to REALLY get to know your mate’s likes and dislikes. Don’t be afraid to cater to their needs. Read together, laugh together, and share a spiritual life together.
Shelia M. Goss is the Essence Magazine Best-Selling author of My Invisible Husband, Roses are thorns, Violets are true, Paige’s Web and Double Platinum. Besides writing fiction, she’s an entertainment writer. For a detailed bio or to learn more about her books, visit her website www.sheliagoss.com or www.myspace.com/sheliagoss.
xoxo